Epic Adventures in Plumbing

“The washing machine is expelling water.”
“Well that’s not good.”
“No.  No it isn’t.”
“Can you fix it?”
“I will try.”

Secret Wishes or Adventures in Plumbing

If you’ve ever worked with plumbing, you know the unlimited joy it brings.  — A wannabe plumber

And the epic journey began.

It began with a destination and antagonist as any other journey.

Dramatis Persona:

Antagonist – Evil Design of Washing Machine (Evides o’Washma)
Protagonist – Well Intentioned of Naivety (Winten o’Nave)

The day began like any other day in the land.  Sunshine warmed the hearts and minds of the populace and evaporated the previous days’ rain in preparation for the never ending cycle.  But the day was shadowed by events of the night before.  Evides o’Washma attacked the household and flooded the kitchen.

o’Washma the mighty antagonist

o’Washma was generally peaceful but stressful situations would provoke an attack.  The latest attack was the worst yet.  Whether o’Washma was jealous of mother nature and her power or if he just couldn’t take any more.  No one will ever know.  He’s been captured and questioned but will not divulge his secrets.  He just keeps on repeating, “I’ve lost my key.  Find it and you will know.”

The real story lies in the journey.

Winten o’Nave was assigned the mission.  His destination was The Key Source on the other side of town.  He had heard it was the place to go for essential repairs.  (Or did he just assume?)  Knowing that rain was coming later, o’Nave set out early.  He knew the way as he had seen it before but today was different.  Gion ships blocked his path at every turn; they didn’t attack but neither did they let him pass.  They were spectacular constructs and warranted serious consideration but now was not the time.  The mission came first.  Time to marvel at their construction and cultural significance would have to come later.

Gorgeous Gion

After many detours around the Gion, o’Nave arrived at his destination.  He entered the building and was immediately overwhelmed by the selection of repair materials.  Where do I begin?  He thought.  His wandering instinctively brought him to the plumbing section where he was pretty sure he would find o’Washma’s key.  The shelf presented many options.  o’Washma didn’t specify which key was the right one.  Luckily, o’Nave brought his handy notebook and made an educated decision.  For extra assurance, he asked for help from the store associates.  A different language was spoken but they managed to agree that this key would work.  o’Nave headed home to present the key to o’Washma.

After much ceremony, o’Washma reluctantly accepted the key.  o’Nave was a little leery and didn’t trust o’Washma and the new key.  They ran a cycle together and all was fine.  Confidence poured from o’Nave as he prepared another cycle with o’Washma.  All was well.

Then tragedy struck.

The key silently slipped from its casing and o’Washma had a fit the likes the household had never before seen.  o’Nave went to the rescue, but was too late.  o’Washma in his rage managed to mangle the new key and erupted outrageous quantities of water.  Defeated, o’Nave went back to the drawing board, knowing now that his mission had been too easy.

o’Nave battled mother nature, each day she would attack him with fierce winds and sideways rain as he exited the household, forcing him to retreat.  Finally, mother nature abated and he was able to pursue his journey once again.  This time o’Nave enlisted a party to help him.  One guide and one translator assisted him.  (Thank you Pamela and Jenn!)  Three days of travel and many more missteps and trials found him at his final destination.  The correct key was there but they didn’t have it in stock.  They would have to order it.  His translator did her job excellently and all went well, the order was placed and set to arrive in another week.  All that was left was to wait.

I want to thank the store associates that assisted me.  They have more patience than they know and I am grateful to them for investing their time.  I also want to thank the two beautiful and brilliant women that helped me.  I will try to be less of a burden next time.  ありがとうございました。


About Matthew J. Durocher

Matthew Durocher is a graduate of Michigan Tech University. He acquired his BA in English along with a minor in Music Composition and a certificate in Writing in Spring 2012. His style is one of passion and musicality. One foot is firmly rooted in tradition while the other slides dangerously close to the clouds.
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